| WOWOWOWOWOW!!!!!! |
[Wednesday
October 27th, 4:35pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 Infatuated |
] |
Alright so I finally met someone, omg I can't even describe it... We talked for like 4 hours on the phone last night, and I feel like I've known him all my life. He's so sweet, romantic, kind, spiritual, absolutely everything I've ever looked for in another person. Good looking omg let me tell you.. he's so hot, he's got the most amazing eyes. He's an artist!!!!!! He is really smart, which amazes me. He knows about art history, world history, he speaks French and Spanish. He's so perfect. He's punctual and hardworking. He knows everything about Poland, he has a lot of Polish friends, he snowboards, and for the first time I didn't compare him or think about Adam... wow Adam seems like a immature little loser compared to him... I so want this to work out, wow! His family lives in BC, his mom is a prof. He's very family oriented, he wants four boys, and even has names picked out. I literally get chills when we talk. He is like the male version of me. Oh I don't wanna jinx this, I'm scared I might... Wow "love at first site. There is nothing wrong with this guy, seriously its like he was made to fit my description. He has everything, this almost feels unbelievable. I want to tell all my friends, but i'm so scared I will jinx it. Oh and he's seen me look like a chipmunk already and said I was cute. I got my wisdom teeth pulled today and I haven't even thought about it. And they haven't bled yet, so that might be a good sign. Wow, anyway, I have to go nap now, damn Codeine. WBTYS
|
|
| HAHAHAHA for Chris and Leah |
[Sunday
October 24th, 11:52pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 artistic |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Unchained Melody |
] |
(Chorus)
Oh my love, my darling
I've hungered for your touch
A long, lonely time
And time goes by so slowly
And time can do so much
Are you still mine
I need your love, I need your love
God speed your love to me
Lonely rivers flow to the sea, to the sea
To the open arms of the sea, yeah
Lonely rivers sigh 'Wait for me, wait for me'
I'll be coming home, wait for me
|
|
| woods @ night in the fog |
[Sunday
October 24th, 11:15pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 Sastified |
] |
Hey, today was interesting, Chris and Leah came to help me with my sculpture. It looks like ass btw. LOL!! then we dropped Leah off @ home. We didn't know what to do so we went exploring in the country side. It was so dark, and foggy we couldn't even see the road in front of us. We parked the car somewhere and we went a walking, it was so funny, the whole time I was trying to get picked up as a hitchiker... finally this guy stopped lol it was funny cuz he was black. Then we walked back to the car and drove around some more, and got lost... finally we found our way back. It was a fun time, some good talks, good convo. Talked about feelings n shite. Stupid feelings. I hate feelings lol. Ah everything is so confuzing... I don't even know myself what I'm feeling. Damnit Janet!! Now this got me a thinkin... Oh well the point it was good times, I had a lot of fun!!! well WBTYS
|
|
| Long time, no write |
[Friday
October 22nd, 4:22pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 Drugged up |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
none |
] |
Ok so I'm finally writing in you... So much has happened. Yesterday my Grandpa died, my dad flew to Poland, I have mono, and last night I sprained my back. I couldn't move, couldn't even go to the bathroom. I went to the Doc today and he gave me even more meds... so now I'm on antibiotics, anti-inflammatory meds, muscle relaxants and cough syrup. I have so much work to do too... GAH! On Sunday Chris is coming down to help me with sculpture (right Chris?) thank god, I don't think I could do it on my own. Oh but one good thing did happen, I made pumpkin pie, from the pumpkins in our garden mmmm it was sooo yummy. I'm really drowsy cuz I'm all drugged up. Mmmmmmmmmm Codeine. Well WBTYS
|
|
| We all need a good laugh once in a while (GOYNG) |
[Wednesday
October 6th, 9:28pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
lol just touch my body |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Eminem |
] |
Guess who's back...
Back again...
Shady's Back...
Tell a friend...
Now everyone report to the dance floor...to the dance floor...to the dance floor...
Now everyone report to the dance floor...alright stop: pajama time
Come here little kiddies, On my lap,
Guess who's back with a brand new rap,
And I don't mean rap as in a new case of child investigation, accusation,(yells)
No worries papa's got a brand new bag of toys, what else could I possibly do to make noise, I done touched on everything but little boys,
And that's not a stab at Michael,
That's just a metaphor,
I'm just psycho,
I go a little bit crazy sometimes,
I get a little bit out of control with my rhymes,
Good God, dip do a little slide,
Bend down touch your toes and just glide,
To the center of the dance floor,
Like TP for my bunghole,
And it's cool if you let one go,
Nobody's gonna know, who'll hear it,
Give a little poo-poo it's ok,
Oops my cd just skipped,
And everyone just heard you let one rip,
Now I'm gonna make you dance, it's your chance,
Yeah boy shake that ass, Whoops I mean girl,
Girl, girl, girl,
GIrl you know your my world,
Alright now Lose it,
(yells)
Just lose it,
(yells)
Go crazy
(yells)
Oh baby,oh baby baby
It's Friday, and it's my day just to party,
All the way till Sunday, maybe till Monday,
I don't know what day, everyday's just a holiday,
Cruisin' down the freeway, feelin' kinda breezy,
Let the top down and my hair blow,
I don't know where I'm going,
All I know is when I get there,
Someone's gonna touch my body,
Excuse me miss, I don't mean to sound like a jerk,
But I'm feelin just a little stressed out from work,
Could you punch me in the stomach and pull my hair,
Spit on me, maybe gouge my eyes out, yeah!
Now what's your name girl, what's your sign?
Man you must be up out your mind,
Dre! (yells) Beer goggles blind!
I'm just trying to unwind!
Now I'm gonna make you dance, it's your chance,
Yeah boy shake that ass, Whoops I mean girl,
Girl, girl, girl,
GIrl you know your my world,
Alright now Lose it,
(yells)
Just lose it,
(yells)
Go crazy
(yells)
Oh baby,oh baby baby
Well it's Tuesday and I'm locked up,
I'm in jail and I don't know what happened,
They say I was running butt naked,
Down the streets screaming: (yells)
Well I'm sorry,
I don't even remember,
All I know is this much,
I'm not guilty,
They said "Save it boy, we've got you on tape,
Yelling at an old lady to "touch my body"",
Now this is the part where the rap breaks down,
It gets real intense, no one makes a sound,
Everything looks like it's 8 Mile now,
The beat comes back and everybody lose theirselves,
I snap back to reality, Look it's B. Rabbit,
Oh you saw me at the battle?
I'm a grown man, daba daba daba daba daba daba daba daba,
So fellas, (what)
Fellas, (what)
Grab your left nut make your right jealous,
Black girls, white girls, skinny girls, fat girls, tall girls, small girls, I'm calling all girls,
Everyone report to the dance floor,
It's your chance for a little romance or,
Butt squeezing it's the season,
Just go (yells) it's so appealing!
Now I'm gonna make you dance, it's your chance,
Yeah boy shake that ass, Whoops I mean girl,
Girl, girl, girl,
Now you know your my world,
Alright now Lose it,
(yells)
Just lose it,
(yells)
Go crazy
(yells)
Oh baby,oh baby baby
Touch my body, Touch my body,
Ooh boy just touch my body,
I mean girl just touch my body...
HAHAHHAHAHAHAHA Oh man I love that song, its hilarious, gotta trust Eminem to make you piss you pants hahahaahaha
|
|
| Yesternight |
[Saturday
October 2nd, 11:25am] |
|
Well, since I haven't written in you for a while maybe I should... I was supposed to go on a date last night at 7:30 with Ryan, but I ended up getting there at 8:15 or so, cuz, my neighbor's dog Toby got hit by a car. He was in shock and we couldn't tell what was wrong with him and they took him to the vet. I still haven't called them to see if he's ok. Well back to the date.... ummmmm I dunno, he's a little too old for me, a little too mature. I think he's looking for a wife now not a gf, and I was the wrong person to go out with. The whole time he kept talking about things like family, kids, his house that he just got built etc.... Dinner rocked, mmmmmmm sushi, the club was really fun, except for Carlos being there (yikes) Carlos is the bouncer from my work that I've been "chillin" with. He didn't really pay attention to me, I just said hi once. I saw a lot of my friends at the club, Nikki, Kate, Tarah, Rob was there too, but he was working, and some others. I didn't end up drinking cuz I was driving. But overall it was ok. I'm going with Leah to the gym today, first the ice fields, then the pac for a swim. I have to work tonight too bah. I'm not in the mood to work at all. The weather sux too, its rainy and yucky. Oh I got my ski membership today. I think skiing is the only thing that gonna get me thro winter. And I'm also in the ski club and trying out for the ski team this year. Although I know I'll make it. And durring reading week there's a trip to BC (Whistler) it will prolly cost around $700-800 becuase of the group discount, which is awsome!!! I'm going on that for sure. Also my mom told me that for X-MAS I'm getting a snowboard, which is also amazing, I love snowboarding. I have all of Dec. off cuz I have no exams... so if it snows by then I'm set. I'll be skiing everyday, and then snowboarding. So I'm gonna start going to the gym 3-4 times a week to get into shape before it snows. I'm so excited about this winter. Me and my dad also decided to get a Blue Mountain pass, which he gets 50% off of becuase he's Mr. Head Ski Patrol. So we'll be going up there on Fridays. This way I won't have time for boys, dates etc... its my way out of the whole dating scene, if I'm busy with something else, I won't have time to fall into the trap of a relationship. MWA HA HA excellent. And now that my dad got all brand new equipment for his B-DAY it get his old racing skis which leaves me with my old trick skis for the park. Now I can grind the rail all I want without worrying about scratching. Ahhh thinking about skiing and winter makes me feel so much better. YAY.... well I still have to go shower, and read some art history before I go out with Leah, so I'll WBTYS!!
|
|
| So sick of boyz |
[Monday
September 20th, 6:13pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 horny |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Evanescence - "Bring Me to Life" |
] |
So today was brutal, I had sculpture in the morning, then painting, the I went to the early screning of film, I just got home. I'm supposed to go to a swing dance today, and then I have a date with this guy named AJ. We've been kinda planning this date for a bit, but I'm just too tired. We are supposed to meet at Williams and then go to Philties. I really don't feel like a date tonight. I have another date on Wed. @ Mongolian Grill with Aaron. I think I might just blow AJ off tonight and see Aaron on Wed. Plus Aaron is nicer. And then, I'm supposed to meet Ryan on Sat. for lunch. This is a busy week for my love life eh? its also a busy week with school too. Why is it when I'm looking for a guy, I can't find one decent man, but when I just want a break from guys, I get like 3 dates a week? huh... and I hate the "dating" period too, I just want to find a dude, get laid, relieve some stress, and then thats it... no commitment, no mushy gushy girlfriend/boyfriend shit. From now on I'm gonne be really up front with my dating, tell them straight up: " look buddy, I'm not here to be your girlfriend, we're just seeing each other, so pull your pants down and lets go" well maybe not that up front, but you all know what I mean. Plus I have no time for relationships. So its been like 2 weeks since the last time I had sex, and its starting to get to me. I'm getting the twitch, plus I get bitchy without it. Fuck, maybe I should just go out with AJ tonight, might do me some good.
|
|
| SWING |
[Sunday
September 19th, 4:27pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
excited |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Swing |
] |
So, I got up at 12:45 today, because I was working all last night, and realized there was a message on my machine. It was Andrea asking me if I wanted to take swing dancing lessons with her at 1. So I threw on the closest thing to my bed, and drove to the PAC. Swing dancing was sooo awsome!! I love it, I have regular classes on Sundays, and night classes at the Volt on Mondays. We're also taking Salsa lessons, and I just joined the Ski club!! YAY!!! I have so much homework to do today so I guess I should go, but i just wanted to brag.... YAY Swing and Salsa.
|
|
| Image |
[Saturday
September 18th, 7:14pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 sad |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
This |
] |
This song reflects me quite well.......
I've been looking in the mirror for so long.
That I've come to believe my soul's on the other side.
All the little pieces falling, shatter.
Shards of me,
To sharp to put back together.
To small to matter,
But big enough to cut me into so many little pieces.
If I try to touch her,
And I bleed,
I bleed,
And I breathe,
I breathe no more.
Take a breath and I try to draw from my spirits well.
Yet again you refuse to drink like a stubborn child.
Lie to me,
Convince me that I've been sick forever.
And all of this,
Will make sense when I get better.
But I know the difference,
Between myself and my reflection.
I just can't help but to wonder,
Which of us do you love.
So I bleed,
I bleed,
And I breathe,
I breathe no...
Bleed,
I bleed,
And I breathe,
I breathe,
I breathe-
I breathe no more.
|
|
| FUCK THE WORLD!!!! |
[Saturday
September 18th, 6:04pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
depressed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
FUCK YOU!!! |
] |
So here is my I hate the world and everyone in it entry, you always need one once in a while, just so you know I'm really me. So I'm fucking pissed off beyond control, I don't know weather to cry, scream.. whatever. I hate life as always, and all I want is to smash something. So I've noticed I've been feeling like this... huh, what to do? I no longer have my psychiatrist, or my psychologist because I'm 19, finding a new one could take forever. I still have a bottle of Zoloft lying around, maybe I should start taking my meds again, before this shit gets out of control. I hate this! Its fucking hell trying to live with this shit, I no longer can hide it. I guess it started to come out late Aug, like last year. But last year was bad, and I had Adam along for the ride, which made things worse. Maybe if I'm on my own I can fight it better. Or maybe I should just do something stupid, end up in the hospital again for a couple of weeks... this time I'd be on the adult ward, which a lot nicer. Or I could just start drinking... A LOT, that helps sometimes. FUCK FUCK FUCK I hate this shit, I hate feeling like this, I hate being angry and depressed all the time, why do I feel like this? Why do I have to suffer, and its not even me that matters, why do I have to put everyone around me through hell. I hate what I do to my parents, I hate the things I say, but yet I have absolutely no control over it. I can't focus on art, I can't focus on anything. It seems like I fuck up every relationship I've ever had (because of this) I feel so guilty for being this way. I'm so fucking sorry to everyone for being like this, I really don't want to. Sometimes I wish I had no family and friends, I wouldn't feel so guilty, the guilt is sometimes worse then the depression. ITS NOT MY FAULT!!! I don't want to be fucked up, I don't want to be a mess up. I lost Adam because of this, I gave my mom a nervous breakdown... I just want to be fucking normal... Is that too much to ask for? Why me? huh why do I have to go through this? WHAT did I ever do to anyone? I'm such a wuss too. I love everyone too much to do what I once tried to do, but sometimes its just so easy to think about. I mean I never would, although I wish I could. The thought of hurting those around me seems much more worse then death, Why do people have to love/ like me? God! I'm so confuzed and angry, and everything AHHHH!!! I can't handle it anymore, I can't handle anything. Why can't my brain just function correctly, produce all the chemicals correctly. This is so hard to live with. I just don't know what to do anymore. I'm desperately avoiding the whole lying in bed for weeks on end thing, cuz thats a pain. This is so complicated. I just want to get better.
|
|
| Last Night |
[Saturday
September 18th, 12:32pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 Meh, can't complain |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Island in the Sun (Weezer) |
] |
So me and Mike were both sick, first we went out for "coffee" then grabbed some sushi hahaha. That was fun, then we went over to his house for a little Mona Lisa Smile, and Fight Club. His parents weren't home (they left for the weekend) We stayed up till like 2. We were on the net for a little while messing around with his web cam... lol. We were talking to this guy Ryan that I've kinda been talking to for a while, I met him in TO on my B-day, he's 26, and he does Architecture, or something like that. Ryan kept telling Mike to put the moves on me.. so we kinda entertained him a bit lol... hahaha (don't worry nothing too bad) just a bit of "making out" lol HAA!!! So last night ended up being a good one. We managed to infect the whole town with our sickness, as well as break the bench in Williams. I'm going to work tonight, and I'm supposed to meet up with this guy from Laurier at Mell's before hand. So hopefully that goes good. I wanna tie dye some clothes really bad for art... lol. Oh today is gonna be a long day, we were gonna go mushroom picking but me papa had to work. Well at least I'll get some time for homework. Well WBTYS
|
|
| Using the journal for its real purpose |
[Friday
September 17th, 3:36pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
depressed like always |
] |
Oh man, I feel horrible right now, it seems like I'm always the bad guy, and I know I am. I just told Chris the truth about things, and how I really feel. Yikes, seriously why dosn't someone just shoot me. I'm always mean, I can't help it, I guess I'm just hurting inside, and try to take it out on everyone else, or just those that I know I can hurt. The truth is I hate guys.. all of them, and no one will ever be good enough for me. I know I seem a little cocky, about things its just that I had everything I ever wanted, and I blew it. And I'm angry at myself for fucking up the one good thing I had going for me, although I shouldn't blame myself, because I couldn't help being sick (severe clinical depression) which is what pushed him away from me, in a sense... I was also very controlling, selfish, iratable etc... The point is that I'm not over him, at all, I want him back so bad, but when I had the chances to take him back, I refused. I'm sooo mad with myself right now, I hate who I am, and what I do to people. I'm the definition of a bitch, but I can't stop.. I'm just so mad at the world and the past, and who I am, and why things happened the way they did.. I just wish I could go back in time... maybe a year, with all the knowledge that I have now... and change things. I know everyone wishes that but still... I am very sorry for everything that I've done to others that hurt them. I guess its just human nature, a defense mechanism. Anyways WBTYS
|
|
| Je vous aime |
[Friday
September 17th, 12:09pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
naughty |
] |
Ahhh OMG! whats with me and totally falling for married men, married men with accents and incredible knowledge of art. Damnit, Oh I want him so bad, I feel like a little school girl. I know nothing can happen, but he's so perfect. And the other day he was helping me with my oil painting, I thought I was gonna die, he told me he loved it... "I love you, Francois" Gah... Oh I had a dream about him last night. If I make a move on him 2 things could happen... #1 : He accepts, I become a home wrecker, and get really good marks, and get a perfect guy for a term, until he flys back to France, or #2 : He totally declines, gets mad at me for suggesting it, dosn't help me with my art... and I eventually will get bad marks... and be heart brocken... HUH??? What to do, what to do... hahaha. Obviously I'm not gonna hit on him, but still, theres something I have to do... Oh Francois, if only you knew my feelings for you, HAHAHAHAHAHA, I'm not that much of a freak but still... Well I guess I have to go finish my laundry, take Tango to the vet, for a puppy manicure/pedicure, finish my still life conte drawing, and get ready for my coffee date with Jen and Liz (oh I'm so happy for them, they're so cute together)Well WBTYS
|
|
| Amour De Paris |
[Thursday
September 16th, 7:32pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
artistic |
] |
So... I called in sick today, and went for a nap, cuz i was feeling so fucking lousy, and i had this crazy dream... I was in Paris, dressed all in black, sitting in a little cafe with my sketch book. All of a sudden this tall guy, black hair (looking a little Mediterranean) tall, very buff (sort of like Francois [I have no idea how to spell his name] my TA for painting) mmm ummm.. too bad he's married!!! (then again his wife is in France) or so he says... Anyways, this tall handsome french man sits down at the table with me and we start to discuss art. We then stroll around Paris... and end up in this little apartment. Everything inside is completely white, I'm wearing white, he's all in white, anyway, ends up being the most intense dream of my life. Oh I'm so moving to Europe, living in a little apartment above a coffee shop, in Paris, filled with paintings. Oh how I wish. I can be a crazy artist lady, wearing my crazy clothes. I'll have a cat, and a fish bowl, like in Amelie. And then one day some handsome fashion designer or something of that sort will whisk me of my feet... yada yada yada anyway... I'm gonna go rent a movie now and go watch it at Mikes house, were both sick, I think I might sleep over. WBTYS
|
|
| AHHHH |
[Thursday
September 16th, 10:50am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 annoyed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
none |
] |
Guess what! I'm sick again... Strepthroat!!! bastard!! oh and Mike is sick too, and we both got sick at the same time... We wanna kill the person who gave it to us!!!!!!! I can't swallow anything again and I'm soooo hungry. I have to miss Art History so I can go to the doctor. I'm working Louies, tonight, tomorrow and Saturday. ohhh (sob) Wow this week just sucked the ass. There is this crazy guy in my art class, who I know for a fact likes me, and he like me last year too... But he's a freak and he's really ugly. He added me to msn, and I didn't know it was him. Gah! Now I have to share a locker with him for drawing. Gag! Well I guess I'll go now WBTYS
|
|
| School and Work |
[Wednesday
September 15th, 8:37pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
SNORE zzzzzzzz |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
the little voice inside my head |
] |
Ah today has been a very long day. I worked at Loose Change Louie's till 3:45 last night, because we had some huge Maxum even or something... And way last call ended up being 3, and I was the only one who was cleaning. At least I got to kick a lot of people out... that was fun, including Dave and his GF (Adam's good friend) because Tagen (the gf) was totally trashed. I also kicked out Erick (Amanda's old boy) same reason. This one drunk guy started to push me around cuz I was kicking him out, so Radio (a bouncer) broke his nose... the point is that last night was insane... I've never seen it that busy, maybe because they were giving out free beer, because of the Canada game. Today I was up by 8, so I could get to sculpture for nine, had that till 12, then had painting. That was supposed to last till 3, but I stayed till 7 and worked on my oil painting, and then went to film class. My painting prof. called me Bob Ross today, because I whipped up an oil landscape in 2 hours.. lol, and it looked like a Bob Ross too... hahaha, so far I'm the star of the class, god! I love being the best hahaha, everyone was complimenting my work, and telling me I have so much talent (way to boost my ego)Its gonna be an early night for me. I'm so tired, and I feel like I'm getting sick again, I woke up with a sore throat again. This week has been so crazy and hectic, too much to handle, oh well (*suck it up, and take it like a man eh*) lol anyway, g2g WBTYS
|
|
| Mmmm cheese |
[Tuesday
September 7th, 4:33pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
good |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
REM |
] |
Hey hey, The weekend was fun!!! Me and Leah went up North to Kaszuby. We had a good time, except for these guys that were there.... OMG there was two little kids (Wojtek and Alex) they were so goddamn annoying ahhhh, and then there older brother Mike was there (age 17) holy fuckness if I were there parents I would have smacked them so fucking hard BAH!! Mike was the worst cuz he was older. He was acting like he was 14 the whole time, and he even provoked oliver to act stupid. I swear all he wanted to do is get laid. The one night we were all drinking and I kinda got tipsy, and Mike was kinda drunk... Ahhhh he was just a stupid horny little fuck. But I ended up telling him off good. I told him to get the fuck out of my cabin and that he was fucking immature yada yada yada, he left and didn't talk to me till he left hahaha. Me and Leah went exploring in the canoe all over the lake it was fun. We also swam from the cottage to the beach like 4 times. My mom was having a good time, the first night she got trashed and went skinny dipping with the guys, and the second night she was puffin the Ganja with this guy Peter hahaha. Over all the trip was a success! yay! I have to work at Luie's tonight.. yay first day on the job, I should really take a nap since I haven't slept yet since yesterday. We left Kasuby last night around 1, and got home at 5. Well WBTYS gonna go zzzzzzzzz now.
|
|
| Song |
[Friday
September 3rd, 5:34pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
enraged!!! hahaha |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Let the bodies hit the floor |
] |
I had another bad night so I decided to write a song of how I felt.... wow I feel so much better, now all I need is a band, I even wrote down the music to the lyrics.....
Pretty Square Head
Pretty pretty pretty pretty boy
You walk around like your king shit
Think you know it all
You think you’re hot and sexy
Cuz you’re in a band
Think you and your boyz are gonna make it
Yall think you’re so grand
I fell for you once, not gonna do it again
Thought you were my lovebird
I was your number one fan
You think you’re so pretty
You think you’re so cool
Go ahead, walk around square head
You look like a fool
Nothing but a loser
Nothing but a flop
Try to steel my heart and break it
You thought you were acting so tough
But now you’re the one who’s crying
And I’m walking away strong
Thought you won this battle, but I won the war
Cuz you’re nothing but a loser…. With your big square head
Put that in your pipe and smoke it
You’re better of dead!
Thought you could hurt me?
With those excuses and lies
I wasn’t gonna listen anyway
I wasn’t gonna give you no time
You think you’re so pretty
You think you’re so cool
Go ahead, walk around square head
You look like a fool
Sitting around, smoking your weed
Drinking cheep beer, eating Cheeze Wiz
Yall nothing but coke heads anyways
With no futures ahead
Everything relies on Welfare
And that’s how you’ll spend the rest of your days
Pretty pretty pretty pretty boy
You walk around like your king shit
Think you know it all
You think you’re hot and sexy
Cuz you’re in a band
Think you and your boyz are gonna make it
Yall think you’re so grand
Not gonna take me down, I’m closing my eyes
Not gonna leave a mark on my soul
You’re erased from my mind
No more lost nights and nightmares
No more thoughts of what could have been
No more thinking of you
No more crying!!!
You think you’re so pretty
You think you’re so cool
Go ahead, walk around square head
You look like a fool
To me you’re lost forever
Along with your lies
It was all about you anyways
Only you and your guys
I’m on to new and bigger things
New boyz, new toyz, new careers
Me and my friends
Pretty pretty pretty pretty boy
You walk around like your king shit
Think you know it all
You think you’re hot and sexy
Cuz you’re in a band
Think you and your boyz are gonna make it
Yall think you’re so grand
Well I’m gonna show the world
No boy can crush this soul
No boy can hurt me, I’m not gonna fall
I’m number one now, this you cannot see
Didn’t wanna love me, didn’t wanna be a daddy
Pretty pretty pretty pretty boy
You walk around like your king shit
Think you know it all
You think you’re hot and sexy
Cuz you’re in a band
Think you and your boyz are gonna make it
Yall think you’re so grand
You think you’re so pretty
You think you’re so cool
Go ahead, walk around square head
You look like a fool
You look like a fool
You look like……
-A fool
Hahaha... I like it! You have to sing it with rage, kinda SUM 41 meets Bif Nkaed, meets Gwen Stefani, its hard to explain what I hear in my head... oh well Ahhhh (smashes guitar on drums!) Ahhhhhhh (jumps off stage in to screaming crowd of devoted fans, and body surfs away into.... "happily ever after") Thank you, thank you......
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| HAHAHA.... I'm SOOOOO TOUGH! |
[Wednesday
September 1st, 12:46pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 accomplished |
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music |
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Metallica |
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Last night was insane.... I was still pretty sick and coughing up a lung but I decided to go to Kelly's good bye dinner at Kelseys. Stephan, Andrea, Connet and obviously Kelly went. After that Andrea convinced me to go to Luie's with her and meet up with Mike. So I went. The first person I saw was Rob Pegg (he's a bouncer there, and an old friend from school) so we were all outside while some pple had a smoke (not me tho I quit) This one Bouncer there (he was huge) started flirting with me lol... and took off his shirt to show me his Canada tattoo lol hahaha, so I started talking to him and asked if Luie's was hiring. He took me to the manager (Dunken)...... Dun Dun Dun now I'm a bouncer at Luie's HAHAHAHA. YAY now I can kick some drunken butt lol. I actually have to be there in about 45 min. I'm still sick too. Oh well hahaha. Well anyways... that was my story, I have to go get dressed now... WBTYS
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| No no no |
[Tuesday
August 31st, 10:27am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 awake |
] |
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music |
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none |
] |
This suxs ass, I dreamt about him again, well not him directly but I was sitting outside JJ's window and I was watching the band. He actually never appeared in the dream but there were references. It was like I was trying to steal his friends. It was really weird, at one point in time I took Simon outside and and I started flying up into the clouds as high as possible and then just dropping, stopping an inch off the ground. Ah I don't know whats wrong with me. Oh well.
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gosia_sex_god's journal
